With Australia Day next week, it got me thinking to what it would take to be considered a local by Sydney standards. I’ve been in the lucky country for just over a decade in total, if not consecutively, and although I like to think I can keep up with the best of them on a good day, there are certain ways you can tell the difference between a FOB (fresh-off-the-boat) and someone born and bred in Australia. Here are 7 signs you’re a true blue Aussie.
1. You’re all about critter conservation
When confronted by a huntsman spider (which can grow up to 12 inches in leg span) in your home, you bypass the Mortein and instead reach for a plastic container in order to perform a delicate capture-and-release spider operation. You wish the little critter good luck and hope it eats all the roaches when you release it outside.
2. You do not drink Fosters. Ever.
No true blue Aussie drinks Fosters. There’ll be Fourex, VB, even Melbourne Bitters, and any number of a wide range of imported beers – Coronas, Heinekens, Stellas – and increasing in popularity, local microbrews. But never, ever, Fosters. I actually don’t think bars in Sydney even stock it. Goon bags, though – that’s okay, and perfectly acceptable especially smuggled into music festivals.
3. You can abbreviate with the best of them
Australians love to shorten words. Try cossie, mozzie, bikkie, arvo, combo, servo, on for size. If you’re a true blue Aussie, you’ll be able to make entire sentences out of abbreviations. Like this: “Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas.” And you’ll also know that Stevo is totes an abbreviation of Steve. Because it just is.
4. You’ve mastered the art of cricket
Better, you play cricket and have mad fast bowling skills. Even better, you have watched an entire Test match and contributed significantly to the beer snake that miraculously came about, somewhere around the middle of the second day.
5. Your plans for Australia Day involve the beach, two up, and beer
Australia Day is the perfect day for indulging in that curious Aussie mash up of interests – the great outdoors, the beach, gambling and beer (of course). If you’re doing anything else (besides maybe a thong race – not what you’re thinking) then you’re simply not a true blue Aussie!
6. You say “no worries” at least three times a day
I love this quintessential Australian phrase. It’s slightly lackadaisical, completely relaxed and very charming. It also gets to the heart of the Australian psyche. There are no worries, not here, where there are relatively high wages, blessedly beautiful outdoors and a high standard living – Australia is the lucky country!
7. You think thongs are acceptable footwear basically everywhere
The humble Havaianas is practically a national dress code and is perfect for any and all social situations. You wear them on the walk to the office, to the city, for a 5km coastal hike (true story), and for beachside weddings you pull out the special pair of thongs, the ones with metallic highlights. Also, in lieu of thongs, going barefoot in shopping malls and on buses can also be perfectly acceptable. We love our thongs so much we have annual inflatable giant thong races. #AustraliaIsAwesome
What do you think makes you a true blue Aussie? Sound off below and have a fair dinkum Australia Day!